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I Survived THE HILLS HAVE EYES 1 and 2!

February 2, 2016

The very early works from “master of horror” Wes Craven are an interesting look into the auteur’s overall filmography. You can spot traces of so many of his horror trademark tricks, although they’re not all fully formed yet. I always considered Craven the most intellectual of his brethren, as often times whether his movies worked or not, you could always have long discussions about their themes and meaning. His first two “official” features out of the gate LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT and THE HILLS HAVE EYES are a bit on the nasty side & not the type of horror I personally like to celebrate on a Friday night when I’m trying to unwind from the long work week. Hence it’s been ages since I’ve actually seen them. But for this week’s “Double Take,” I decided to brave not only THE HILLS HAVE EYES, but its 1984 sequel which even Craven himself has dismissed! It was a rough way to kick off my weekend, but the good news is… I survived THE HILLS HAVE EYES 1 & 2!

As always, fact is stranger than fiction and Craven often used real life events as the launching point for a lot of his ideas. In the case of THE HILLS HAVE EYES, it’s loosely based on the Sawney Bean clan that thrived during the 15th century in the caves of Scotland. Alexander “Sawney” Bean and his cannibalistic “family” were rumored to have murdered (and eaten) over 1000 people before the King dispatched a crew of 400 soldiers to hunt them down. For the movie, the Carter family are driving their trailer from Ohio to California and taking a long diversion through the dessert. Their truck breaks down and they find themselves stuck in the middle of nowhere, but that’s the least of their worries. A small clan of cannibalistic killers are surrounding them and hiding in the neighboring hills!

The father Bob (Russ Grieve) is a retired police officer with a weak heart. He decides to try to walk back up the road to the last gas station they stopped at where the owner specifically warned them not to get off the main road. There’s also mom Ethel (played by Virginia Vincent), their teenage kids Bobby (Robert Houston), Brenda (Susan Lanier), eldest daughter Lynne (a young Dee Wallace!), Lynne’s husband Doug (Martin Speer), their baby Katie and their dogs Beauty and Beast.

Something immediately feels off. Bob hasn’t returned yet from the gas station and Bobby treks out into the hills only to find their dog Beauty slit open from the middle on down. He’s freaked by what he finds, yet refuses to tell anyone about it for fear of scaring his family. Later that night, the brothers of the “clan,” the pointy teethed Mars and Pluto (the legendary Michael Berryman!) break into the trailer, kill some of the girls and kidnap the baby. From that point on, the Carter family will have to fight for their lives if they have any hope of recovering baby Katie and making it out of the dessert alive.

There’s also Ruby (Janus Blythe), the young girl of the cannibalistic clan that wants desperately to escape and then the leader Papa Jupiter (James Whitworth). The movie’s pretty exploitive and gross. I mean, literally gross. Despite the murder, gore and rape, the most disgusting thing to me in the movie is Papa Jupiter eating some sort of meat with his mouth open the entire time.

I rather like the finale as I’m a big fan of revenge movies and seeing the tables turned on the monsters, but I still remain only a moderate fan of this early Craven cult classic. Which brings us to the sequel!

I had never seen THE HILLS HAVE EYES PART 2. It just slipped under my radar all these years and after reading Craven’s comments about how much he really didn’t want to do it, I figured it was better off left unseen. But look, a Blu-Ray now exists and the completist in me can’t resist! So I immediately followed up the original HILLS with this 1984 follow-up. And while I can’t say Craven was wrong about its quality, there are some batshit crazy things happening here that warrant mentioning.

So this time there’s a bus load of kids that for whatever reason decide to travel across the dessert? I’m not sure where they’re going but it’s pivotal they trek across the same dessert where part of Bobby’s family were murdered. So he chickens out, rightfully so. Joining them instead is Ruby, the now reformed younger sister of the murderous clan of the original once again played by Janus Blythe. As should be expected, they break down in the dessert and are surrounded by Pluto (a welcome return from Michael Berryman) and The Reaper, Papa Jupiter’s equally disgusting brother!

What’s surprising this time is that the film plays more like a “slasher” than the first one did, which is only amplified by Harry Manfredini’s score, once again hearkening to his work on the FRIDAY THE 13TH movies. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention another returning character from the original.. Beast, the dog. And not only is he back, he has flashbacks to the events of the first movie. That’s right, fiends. Doggy flashbacks! But in all fairness, he’s probably the most competent, most bad-ass character of the two movies that does more damage to the “clan” than any of the Carter family.

The second HILLS HAVE EYES is far from “good,” by traditional horror sequel standards, but I don’t think the Rotten Tomatoes 0 star rating is very fair. Hey, I laughed enough, especially at Pluto’s unrelenting fear of Beast the dog. And if you have to watch it, pairing it up with the original isn’t a bad way to go. Does it make for a fun Friday night? Nah, but my Friday nights are never fun.

Stay tuned as I’m going to continue this experiment next week and endure THE HILLS HAVE EYES remake and its sequel to test if they both make for a good double feature!

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